It is three weeks until my wedding. A usually blissful occasion for a bride to be except when your partner has a last name that you simply can’t see yourself having attached to you for the rest of your days.

My partner, a sweet, caring and all round wonderful man who ticks every single ‘suitable partner’ box, bar one, his last name: Puyol, that’s it, Puyol. Now close your eyes and say it slowly to yourself. Are you sniggering yet?

‘Poo-hole’. That’s right, the million dollar question is do I become a ‘Poo-hole’ or not?

To further complicate matters, I am also pregnant with a baby girl. This means I must now consider my unborn child’s psychological welfare as well as my own.

I have often wondered what other women do in such a predicament. I have turned to my friends to try to find the answer.

A close friend of mine who has recently married has hyphenated her and her partners last name. Finally, a solution I thought: Wrong. My last name is Szili, often referred to as ‘Silly’. So, if I take this path I am to become a ‘Silly-Poo-hole’.

Just think of my poor child with her hyphenated last name. The school yard bullies would surely circle her like vultures just waiting to attack with high a pitched, rhythmic ‘Silly-Poo-hole’, na na na na na na.

Another friend simply kept her last name. I could do this, however, she constantly complains to me about how annoying it is to have to regularly correct people when they make the assumption that everyone in her family has the same last name. I can see that this option is not a good one as my low frustration tolerance sits at an extremely unhealthy level.

Alternatively, I could take my partners last name and just mumble whenever I am asked to say my full name, or I could just call myself Adriana. Hey, if it’s good enough for Madonna it’s good enough for me!

Let’s face it, there is no easy solution to such a dilemma. My heart goes out to all the women who are in a similar quandary.

But let me offer one piece of advice to any female who finds herself marrying a man with, let’s say, a challenging last name. Make sure that you love your partner enough to be labelled a ‘Poo-hole’ or equivalent. Or just don’t marry him!